So what do you do exactly when 2 of your best friends who are dating, fight constantly?
Like, I’m trying not to pick sides, but I can see them falling apart and it just hurts to see either of them go through this.
oh well, I suppose. @-@ Not much that can be done, when I’m not directly involved, and it’s not any of my business aside from my being good friends with both of them. I just want to be a good friend where I can be a good friend. You feel me?
He makes me smile a lot. Like, all the time and it’s really great. What’s the best though is when he smiles. He has a really fantastic smile and just. Gah!
The semester is almost over! My college freshman year is almost halfway done at this point! :0
The art honor’s program here doesn’t allow entry to those who are not entering freshmen (and I’ll be in my second semester of freshman year this spring). I didn’t know about it, so there isn’t ever going to be a way for me to join. I just feel very rejected and sad because I literally can’t join this awesome program.
I just disappoint myself a lot because I miss important things like this. It sucks to be disappointed in yourself, more than it sucks to have others disappointed in you.
I’m just a terrible girlfriend. I really awful one.
I cannot fathom reducing everything we feel down to a single word. I cannot commit myself to call what we are something so basic.
But maybe that’s just it. Maybe you and I are basic necessities for living.
I mean really living.
And what I mean is, we appreciate more in life and we see more in life and everything that was once monochrome somehow gained color and I’m not sure if you are as speechless as I am, but I do know one thing.
And I mean I know it, because I can feel it like the oxygen cycling in and out of my airways.
We are in love.
I’m not sure if that means we are what geometric shapes are supposed to symbolize or if we deal with each other like some deal with their families.
All I know is it’s worthwhile having to miss you so much. I know that you’re going to be there for me. I hope you know that whenever you need me I’m here.
I know I love you, but I won’t pretend to think that such a simple word can summarize the way light dwells in your eyes when you look at me, or how the swell in my chest when I think about how you are mine and I am yours and we’re still our own people, or how I fit in your arms.
I know I love you, but there’s a lot more to being in love than saying so.
But for now, this is me saying so:
I love you.
I’m not sure if I can just call it love anymore.
My days feel empty if he isn’t next to me and my mind always has this way of finding him in everything I do in a day (walking down the street, reading my books, listening to the words spilling from other mouths, etc.)
I will not fall asleep thinking anything other than “I wish he were here”
and I will not fall asleep thinking anything other than “I hope he sleeps well tonight”
I’m not sure if I can call it love anymore because the word is far too simple and I cannot reduce what we feel down to a 4 letter word.
I have a lot.
I don’t mean in siblings, or parents, or aunts and uncles, or cousins, or grandparents.
I mean I have a lot of people who care about me and would help me in any way that they could. Some of them I don’t see often and some of them I speak to every day.
There’s just a bigger definition to family than the hereditary blood that ties people together; it’s the willingness to be there for each other no matter what.